Waccenture: “It’s official – We’re above the law!’

Following close analysis of recent court cases and fines for rival consulting groups, Waccenture can announce that, as of this morning, we are officially above the law!

“a serious lack of competence in conducting the audit work”.

To remain above the law and under the radar, we have agreed with the the Financial Reporting Council (FRC) to one proviso – that when we fuck up, we admit our mistakes and allow one low-ranking staff member to carry the can.

The precedent has been set over the past couple of years by PwC and KPMG, both of whom have had their legs slapped, financially speaking, for corrupt or incompetent practices. The fines however are a drop in the ocean compared to the vast sums consulting groups like ours make from government contracts and cozy relationships with our international, tax dodging clients.

The most recent example of this is the PwC fines announced today for what was described by the Financial Reporting Council (FRC), which regulates auditors, as “a serious lack of competence in conducting the audit work”.

The FRC which regulates auditors, reduced the fine to £4.55m after PwC admitted its mistakes.

For more on this story, click here: https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-48621095

PWC has run into trouble with the regulator several times in recent years:

  • In 2018, it was fined £6.5m for poor auditing of collapsed department store BHS
  • In 2017, it was fined £5.1m for a poor audit of failed auditor RSM Tenon Group
  • Also in 2017, PwC was fined £5m for misconduct in its audit work for failed maintenance firm Connaught

In April this year KPMG was fined £6m, “severely reprimanded” and told to undertake an internal review over the way it audited an insurance company.

The FRC is also investigating the accountancy giant’s audit of the government contractor Carillion, which collapsed under £1bn of debt last year. 

In June 2018, the FRC also found an “unacceptable deterioration” in KPMG’s work and said it would be subject to closer supervision.

As with PWC, the response by KPMG has been to state they have ‘put their house in order’

So there you are. The Gravy Train will continue to stop at regular intervals at the Wacccenture station and our shareholders can rest assured we will be unloading huge sums of money for them to invest off-shore for the foreseeable future.

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